AI-Top 12 Girls 2/20/08

I’m still in my position of Superiority, if for no other reason than the fact that I am not delusional about being a fantastic singer. If you cant carry a tune in a bucket, wearing a low cut top and extra eye shadow won't save you….. for very long…despite some rebuttals, I’m sticking with my "straight guys don’t vote" theory.

The whole theme of the show seemed to be the "Woo Hoo We’re in Hollywood Gigglefest" and all that was missing were the pillows for the pillowfight at bedtime.

Spare me.

Loved Ryan’s dramatic opening about the WORST COLD AND FLU SEASON EVER hits the Idols….now he’s the CDC? How come none of the guys were able to use the "I’m sick, poor me" excuse? Rehearsals in surgical masks and blankets? What a missed photo op/potential poster for infection control sponsored by AT&T, Coke, FORD and/or Trojan!!

Kristy Lee Cook-First Barbie of the evening-boo hoo hoo she had to sell her horse to pay for her trip from Oregon to Philly to audition. Seems like maybe she could have auditioned closer to home, I must be missing the point. How special that she’s going to buy it back when she wins. WHAT?!?? Very pretty girl, performance was nondescript, vocals were poor…boo hoo hoo I’m so sick. Sang "Rescue Me" but I don’t think anyone can at this point.

Joanne Borgella-thank God we’ve got a "big" girl amidst the rest of the Barbies-although I’m not really convinced that she qualifies as a plus-size model-what is she? About a 14?? (You want some REAL plus-sizers? Visit any Wal-Mart after midnight for the "juicy" brigade) This girl is pretty, likeable, and seems real-but her vocals were only so-so. Judges were not impressed, but seemed encouraging-they think she can do much better. Big Girls stick together in herds, even for voting-she’ll be safe.

Alaina White-Barbie #2-even though she’s a typical teenaged girl without anything to say between giggles-she really did a great job tonight. Surprised me! Got Wacko Paula all fired up and back on the pathway of joyful, amazing, "feel good," rambling.

Amanda Overmyer-OHNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO where to begin?? The Skunk-like striped hair color? The Amy Winehouse "do"? The painted on jeans? The terrible "Scat" with the guitar? The screaming, screeching, over the top rocker-biker-chick persona? The tattoos? Blue tongue? THIS is a NURSE for respiratory patients? Can you imagine having difficulty breathing and seeing that coming at you? I’d just assume it was Death and give up. Hard rock is not my thing-the judges seemed to like her-I HATED her. I don’t expect to see her get the boot any time soon, but it will be interesting to see how long she lasts.

Amy Davis-a really beautiful brunette Barbie, with a hairdo I can only describe as the DQ forehead curl. Sounded like a 45 rpm record switching back and forth to 33rpm (if you don’t understand "record" references because you’re too young to know vinyl-go ask your Mom and not me) Horrifying performance, can’t even believe she got through Hollywood week with a voice like that. If she stays for another week, it’s only because some straight men DO vote. (Potential to become Season 7’s Haley Scarnato-cant sing, but wear less clothing each week and keep on getting votes-the girl made the top 10 last year!!) She is gorgeous.

Brooke White-the Nanny surprised me-she is so sweet and good and nice and innocent-but she looked and sounded GOOD tonight! Nice to see a Barbie dressed modestly and respecting the judges instead of copping an attitude. I like her.

Alexandrea Lushington-I just cannot get past this girl’s name. I think it is PERFECT for a porno star…" See 'American Idle' starring Buck Naked and INTRODUCING Alexandrea Lushington…" I only remember this girl because she had her 900 year old great grandma at the auditions and grandma told her not to make her cry because "they are taking pictures!" I remember Grandma more than the girl. Randy and Paula raved and loved her-Simon, not so much. I agree with Simon-thought there were better performances, thought there were also worse ones.

Kady Malloy-yet another blonde Barbie, although this one is a Seinfeld two-face

(beautiful from some angles, "yikes" from others) Everyone loved her impersonation of Brittney blah blah blah. I liked her performance, though. It was slow and not lively, but she sang it pretty well. Simon was off base when he told her it was like "night of the living dead" but I think that comment was her death knell.

Asia’h Epperson-the girl who lost her father on her way to audition-raspy sounding voice, looked cute, did an ok job. Her earrings were as big as hula hoops and were parrot-worthy. Judges loved her-I didn’t see much to write home about.

Ramiele Malubay-this little munchkin really belted it out. She’s up to Ryan’s shoulder ( He is 5' 8") in her 4 inch heels so she can’t be 5 ft tall-she’s really a cutie despite the striped hair. Thought she was cute when she said her favorite parts of the competition are hair and makeup and "look at these shoes!" Really prefer something genuine like her response over some drivel about being an inspiration-music is my life and my passion-gifts from God….one to watch

Syesha Mercado-another one to watch-although I really didn’t like her performance of Tobacco Road and thought she was off key a lot. Guess I was wrong-all 3 judges raved about her being "it" and having the whole package, "one of the most talented girls we’ve seen…" Guess that explains why I’m not an official judge-clearly I can’t hear.

Carly Smithson-my favorite of the evening in spite of the tattoos and blue tongue, in spite of her not being "AMERICAN", in spite of her having a recording contract at 15 that she lost when the studio went out of business…. I love this girl. Loved finding out AFTER a great performance that she is sick also, but she herself said "sick is not an excuse" and gave it her best. Not sure why Simon disliked it, but Randy and Paula loved her almost as much as I did. I’m putting money on this girl as one of the top 3, unless we have some new national hate fest about immigrants or green card residents and disqualify her just for being Irish. She’s a business owner in San Diego (tattoo shop!) and seems an unlikely terrorist to me. But then again, I’m one of those bleeding heart commie liberals who don’t think all illegals should be immediately deported, so you cant trust me, either. This would be a good place to insert a reminder to VOTE DEMOCRATIC but that really would be inappropriate.

I was not any more excited by the girls than the guys-I think a lot of them should be shaking in their shoes since 4 of them go home Thursday-2 guys and 2 girls. I’m guessing the girls will lose Amy Davis and Kady Malloy or Kristy Lee Cook Kristy may get the sympathy vote because they made such a big deal about her being sick..

I'm currently more concerned with the theme for next week than who gets the boot tonight. I was thinking a Gilbert and Sullivan Operetta week would be entertaining....How about songs from the Mikado? I'd like to see Simon in the role of Nanki-Poo while 3 of this week's blonde Barbies play Yum Yum , Peep Bo and Pitti Sing and perform "3 Little Maids from School are We" ( What can I say, we had a very thorough musical education in Wisconsin when I was a kid.... I can also sing " My Love Eurydice" in the style of the Ancient Greek....another skill that's not marketable at all-the story of my entire life.)

2 more weeks@ 5 hours to get down to the top 12, and THEN we get a break and go back to 2 nights a week….